Do you ever wonder how people get through the death of a child? Do you ever wonder what gifts spirits can give?
I had a hard week this week with several days of intense grief. While suffering in the evening, I would reach out in my mind to my son, who died about a year-and-a-half ago. “Shawheen, send me a miracle! Help me know you’re there!” This is the message I sent out to him. I remember thinking that he could send me a wild animal real close, or a string of coins like he used to. A few days passed and the grief kept coming, bringing with it chest pain, agitation, and irritability. It brought achy elbows and other achy joints. Crying relieved the agitation, irritability, and the achiness. I would finally sleep after those deep cries. Inevitably there was sleep loss, after spending a hunk of time grieving, but the sleep was good after that grief work.
Now don’t ask me why I was cleaning the chicken coop on Mother’s Day!!! I was fortunate to have the time. One of my children made me breakfast and the two at home made dinner. One of my adult children came over and made dessert and the other brought flowers. All in all I had time on my hands.
I spent time in the garden, planting tomatoes, hot peppers, zucchini, and cucumbers. I put some old chicken manure around the plants and ran out. “Well,” I thought to myself, “I’ll just go clean out the chicken coop and get some more!!”
I scraped and scooped, gathering all I could get from their roost. Then I set about scraping off the floor. Low and behold I found a penny! (Dateed 2015, the year my son died). I kept scooping and then I found a dime, then another penny! Now remember I am in the chicken coop and we don’t throw coins at our chickens. They just don’t appreciate money! So where did those coins come from? I can only say my oldest son visited me on Mother’s Day as well. He waited all week to toss me ‘my string of coins’ on Mother’s Day!!!
All 5 of my children were present and accounted for! Thank you Universe!!